Ruthann “Tani” Carman Wolff
Ruthann “Tani” Carman Wolff, of St. Louis, Missouri, chased her three grandchildren through the Zoo and Botanical Garden just weeks before passing away on February 19, 2022, surrounded by family. She was 75 years old.
Born in Columbus, Ohio, in 1946, Tani grew up with her parents, Ralph and Frances Carman, Grandfather Joel Carman, and younger brothers, Ralph Jr. “Bandy” and John Carman. She rooted for the Buckeyes while attending Ohio State’s University School Highschool, fell in love with the mountains of Vermont at Middlebury College (’68), and braved crossing the frozen Charles River in a mini skirt while earning her MBA from Harvard Business School (’70).
After completing her degrees, Tani moved to St. Louis, making long-lasting friendships. She worked for decades in Marketing while raising two daughters, Elizabeth Kirkendall and Victoria Spies, who feel her love every day of their lives. She also spent time helping others reach their potential by tutoring and consulting for business school admissions, often remaining friends with her clients for years. Though busy, she found ways to stay in touch with good friends and embrace her passions for reading, writing, art, music, cooking, gardening, service and more.
Tani dedicated herself to and delighted in the community contributions of MERS/Goodwill, whose governing board she had served on since 1975, including as Chair of the Board at the time of her death. Her board involvement with the Saint Louis University Library Associates led her to dance the Charleston with Margaret Atwood, and her love of writing committed her to decades of writing research papers (for fun!) with her friends in the Pioneers Literary Club. But the greatest love of her life, beyond family, was Opera Theater of St. Louis, where she served on the Guild Board, published revered articles on the Operas, was a taxi for various singers, and even happily schlepped boxes if that was what was needed. She took every opportunity to join her friends to watch a performance, and rave about a show with a glass of wine under the tent until the wee hours of the morning.
Tani was brilliant, kind, energetic, curious, deeply interested in the world, a lover of beauty in art and nature, a committed friend, and the most loving mother you can imagine. She adored her grandchildren Ethan (7), Oscar (6), and Ayla (4), bragging about them to anyone who would stop and listen. She especially sought opportunities to spend time with her brothers and nieces and their families whenever she could. She will be deeply missed.
A Memorial Service will be held on March 26 at 10:30 AM at the Sally S. Levy Opera Center, 210 Hazel Ave in Webster Grove, 63119. Guests are welcome to wear colors or bright accessories. For everyone’s safety, the venue requires that all guests wear masks and can either show proof of full vaccination or a negative COVID test within the past 24 hours. Visitation will be onsite directly following the service. For those unable to attend in person, we welcome you to join us at the same date and time by zoom at https://bit.ly/
One of Tani’s favorite quotes comes from Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
“I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final say in reality.” Thus as she lived her life, we will love and remember her forever more.
The sun, the moon, the wind, the stars, will forever be around, reminding you of the love you shared, and the peace she’s finally found.” (Author Unknown)
Rest In Peace Tani, with fond memories, I will always remember.
Such a beautiful tribute to such a wonderful lady.
It was a great privilege to share our love of music especially opera with our dear friend, Tani
The opera season will not be the same without her. I miss her already. My deep condolences to the family and all who were touched by her humility and warmth. She was a generous and gentle spirit. What a loss.
Peace and Love 💕
Peace and Love 💕 Tani
So sorry for your loss
Always loved seeing Tani at Harvard Club of St. Louis events. Always a smile on her face and interest in whatever was going on and what was being said. May her memory be a blessing to all who knew and loved her.
Tani and I shared our memories of World Events whenever we happened to see each other at a play somewhere which was not often enough. We were Facebook Friends and I enjoyed reading her posts about her grandchildren. She beamed when she talked about them, and her pride in them illuminated her comments. She will be missed very much. Everyone who knew her loved her. My deep condolences extend to her family.
Tani and I shared our memories of World Events whenever we happened to see each other at a play somewhere which was not often enough. We were Facebook Friends and I enjoyed reading her posts about her grandchildren. She beamed when she talked about them, and her pride in them showed in her comments. She will be missed very much. Everyone who knew her loved her. My deep condolences extend to her family.
Tani was a female pioneer in the corporate world. She was wickedly smart but also one of the kindest, most caring, most compassionate people I knew. Her gift to the world was knowing when and how to reach out and help others in their exact moment of need. I met Tani when her daughters were very young. How she adored them … as babies, as little girls, as tweens, teens, young women, and as Mothers themselves. They, as did their grandchildren, brought her incredible joy. No matter what problem you had, Tani was there for her family and friends. You didn’t even have to be a friend. If Tani crossed paths with you, and you needed help, she was there for you – always without judgement – always with great compassion. In my life, Tani was an angel. I believe God has called her to live among other angels in peace, surrounded with love, and in joyful harmony – where she will be rewarded for all the wonderful memories and all the love she has given to her family and friends. Lizzie and Tori – your Mother adored you both. I hope you know how much she loved you, how proud she was of you, and what joy you and your beautiful children brought to her. You made her life full and complete! I am so sorry for the pain I know you are feeling. xoxoxo
There are no words to explain my great sadness in missing being there in person for this day to celebrate aunt Tani’s life but I will be watching virtually and be there in spirit for our family. Thank you all so much for sharing this time with us in this way.
I knew Tani through her consistent attendance to the art events at the World Chess Hall of Fame. She never missed a class or a concert, and always had a kind word for everyone’s projects and great conversation at her table. I’m so sorry to hear of her passing, and my deepest condolences to her family.
Tani was always with us at family occasions as I was growing up. I felt like she was a cousin. She was so warm and bubbly. I saw her momentarily on a brief trip to St. Louis this past June and I’m so glad I did, though I wish it had been longer. I will attend the online service from here in CA. My thoughts are with her family.