Barbara Sue Helmer

Barbara Sue Parker Helmer, our Songbird, passed away peacefully at home on September 5, 2023. Born to William H. “Red” and Alice Parker on March 6, 1938, she was the eldest of four children. Barb was raised in Centralia, Illinois and graduated from Centralia Township High School in 1956. Those who knew her then might remember her as a cheerleader, senior class vice-president, and member of the Pep Club, Latin Club, and Student Council. Singing for others at a very young age in her church and school choirs, it soon became clear that her voice was something special.

If you know Barb from her younger years, you can still hear her song.

 

A 1959 graduate of the Jewish Hospital School of Nursing in St. Louis, Missouri, Barb began her career at Jewish Hospital as a rehab nurse and instructor, and a few years later took her skills to St. John’s Mercy Hospital. Being a natural leader, she soon moved into the position of Evening House Supervisor. During this time, she also attended Webster College, receiving her Master of Arts degree in 1979. She later became Director of Nursing, a title she held until her retirement from St. John’s in 1994.

In the mid- to late 1960s, Barb could be found fulfilling her nursing duties during the day and singing her heart out at nightclubs all around St. Louis in the evenings. “The spirited blond works Mondays through Fridays as an assistant instructor of in-service learning at Jewish Hospital…but on Thursday evenings, she swaps her crisply starched uniform for a glittering mint dress and three nights of vocal crowd pleasing.” (St. Louis Globe-Democrat, Friday, June 21, 1968) 

Little did Barb know that pursuing her passion of singing would lead her to meet the man she would later marry when she accepted a singing job with the Bill Hulub Trio at the Montclair Hotel. “Her easy rise to popularity has meant many happy times, the happiest of which was April 15, 1967, when she married Jack Helmer, the trio’s bass player.” Barb and Jack went on to be married for nearly 55 years before his passing in the spring of 2022. 

While working as an RN and making a name for herself on the jazz club scene, Barb began building her family with Jack in St. Louis. Professional gigs were eventually put to the side as raising children became her priority. Although extremely proud of her achievements in the nursing and music world, Barb’s greatest points of pride were her children, grandchildren, and the life she and Jack were able to provide for them.

If you know Barb from her working years, you can still hear her song.

With children raised and retirement in full swing, the performing bug crept its way back in, calling her to share that velvety voice once again in nursing homes, retirement communities, and various stages around town. Whether it was at the Sheldon, the Grandel, or the Clayton High School stage, Barb showered her audience with songs from the Great American Songbook, reminding them of days gone by. Most recently, she performed with the St. Louis Showstoppers, an all-volunteer group of performers that produce an annual musical revue to support cancer research at the Siteman Cancer Center at Barnes-Jewish Hospital. In addition to performing with the group, she directed their shows for the past 9 years, served on the board, and until her passing, served as board president.

If you know Barb from her retired years, you can still hear her song.

Barbara had the happiest disposition, and her laugh was contagious. The simple things in life always brought a smile to her face: a good back scratch, chocolate covered cherries, sharing meals with friends and family, fresh-cut flowers, a satisfying sneeze, a pair of black pants that fit without having to be altered, a perfectly cooked pork chop, and daily phone conversations with her brother and/or her best friend, Brenda.

Barb had the good fortune to say goodbye to her family and many dear friends before her passing. She is lovingly remembered as Mom/Ma/Mammy to daughter Alison (Christopher) and son Matthew (Jenna), Barbara Sue to siblings Dan (Ricci), Denise, and Dona, Baba to granddaughters Lily and Abby, Aunt Barbara to nephew Chris (Pat), and Aunt Boggin to nephews Jeff (Alison), Dave, and Ben (Emilie), and niece Jamie. She is cherished by numerous cousins, extended family, and friends.

Barb’s life has been chronicled in various newspaper articles over the years. From her wedding and her innovative work in the rehabilitative health field to juggling her day job as an RN while making her mark as a professional singer, we are lucky to have such detailed accounts. Although it is unknown from which publication the following quote originated, it speaks to who Barb was and will always be to those who knew her: “This lovely and talented ‘Nightingale’ soars on gossamer wings from one end of the night to the other, singing the old and the new, happy and blue. A sure cure for what ails you.”

“The song is ended, but the melody lingers on.”  ~ Irving Berlin

 

Barb’s life will be celebrated at a private gathering in the coming weeks. Those wishing to make an expression of sympathy are asked to consider a donation to either:

 

Mercy South Hospice, 10024 Kennerly Road, St. Louis, MO 63128

Online donations can be made at https://mercyhealthfoundation.net/ by clicking the Donate Now button, then fill out the online form, selecting Missouri > South > SOU deGreefe Hospice House/Hospice Care

~ or ~

St. Louis Showstoppers, 209 Pebble Acres Drive, St. Louis, MO 63141

 

18 Comments

  1. Kathy Smith on September 13, 2023 at 11:43 am

    Barbara Sue Parker Helmer, as I frequently called her, was a co-worker who became a dear friend. The countless laughs and various mishaps we shared together will never be forgotten. Her friendship was a blessing in so many ways.



  2. Brenda Ernst on September 13, 2023 at 3:20 pm

    Barb is the reason I became a nurse. Our friendship started in high-school in Centralia, and continued for over 65 years after Nursing School. We shared many special memories and she was always there to support me during my several episodes of illness. I looked forward to our daily phone chats as we aged, and could aways count on her for words of encouragement. I will miss her terribly!



  3. Ina Odonnell Jewish Hospital Class of 1959 on September 13, 2023 at 4:01 pm

    Barb lit up a room anywhere we would go. We would get together once a month and she always had a funny story to tell she will be greatly missed.



  4. Carol Lochhead Hoffman on September 13, 2023 at 6:40 pm

    I met Barb in nursing school and after graduation, shared an apartment. She was a pure joy. Had so much fun. Loved our many conversations thru the years. She would call and tell on herself about some crazy thing she had done. I will greatly miss her. I dearly loved her.



  5. Joan Zobel on September 13, 2023 at 6:52 pm

    I only met Barb several times when her daughter, Allison, was performing in one of New Line Theatre’s productions. However, from talking to her for just a few minutes, I could tell what a vivacious individual she was. Her pride in her children was evident when she talked about Allison and I’m certain she was just as proud of her son. I wish I had been fortunate enough to know her sooner – I’m sure I would have been one of her biggest fans!



  6. Dorothy Roth -Mercy coworker & longtime friend on September 13, 2023 at 9:31 pm

    Barb was a kind, good person with a joi de vive that I appreciated & emulated. Sing your way to the heavens old friend!



  7. Barbara Harrington on September 14, 2023 at 7:01 am

    Barbara H I was always fascinated by Barbara a genuine woman of many talents but what I will remember most of all was her goodness, kindness and her beauty inside and out. Will miss you dear Barb. Our memories of living thru nurses training together will be one of the memories to cherish.



  8. Dan Parker on September 14, 2023 at 7:30 am

    Barb is my sister. I appreciate so much these lovely words about her. She was special. Heart broken. Memory unbreakable.



  9. Ben Parker on September 14, 2023 at 8:03 am

    So many memories growing up as her nephew, visiting her home for the holidays. Aun’t Boggin’ as she was known by us kids, was a wonderful human. We’ll miss her and always love her. I know she’s with Jack.



  10. De Kaplan on September 14, 2023 at 8:26 pm

    I was a 15 year old candy striper, and Barb was a 1st year nursing student when we met, at then, Jewish Hospital.
    I’m privileged to know and love her all these years.
    Here are just a few things I know about Barb,
    She is talented, smart, kind, loving, positive, non-judgmental, great daughter, great sister , great wife, great mother, great grand mother, standout friend and most cherished foodie.
    ❤️PS Sandra sends her love.



  11. Sherry Swartzbaugh on September 15, 2023 at 11:55 am

    First of all we are sadden to hear of Barb’s passing, neighbor we’ve known since around 1971. Prayers for her entire family & all of her many friends. This orbituary is very touching on Barb & although we never got to see her & Jack perform, I’m sure she was a talented songbird & as much as a very respected Health Care Professional. Barb will be missed by many & glad we knew her for many years.



  12. Dan Laughhunn on September 15, 2023 at 2:56 pm

    We have lost a wonderful person. She was a leader and friend through high school and beyond. I am so thankful that she was a friend. Her singing lifted us up. Her energy gave us inspiration . What a great life. We are all better because of her loving life. Thank you dear Barbara. Love forever.



  13. Dave Clement on September 15, 2023 at 3:54 pm

    Her smile! Does that smile not reflect the wonderful, happy, talented and caring person Barbara was?



  14. Denise Parker on September 19, 2023 at 6:31 pm

    Barbara Sue. My older sister who I loved, laughed with, and looked up to. You are so missed.



  15. Marla and Mike Booth on September 20, 2023 at 5:59 pm

    Dear Barbara, we became closer in our later years through our mutual friend Brenda Ernst. You gave so much happiness and love through your talent, smile and laugh! We extend our deepest sympathies to your family. You were one of a kind, you will be missed by many!



  16. Esther Elizabeth Otto on September 26, 2023 at 9:47 pm

    Dear Barb. She was my supervisor, mentor and friend. So many problems and events she helped me with. She will be missed.



  17. Esther Elizabeth Otto on September 26, 2023 at 9:51 pm

    Dear Barb. She was my supervisor, mento, and friend. We had such fun together and solved some problems together. She will be missed.



  18. Jan Olesky on September 27, 2023 at 9:05 am

    A wonderful woman indeed. Barb was my Director of Nursing at St. John’s Mercy Hospital. Always had a a smile, always knew our names when she made rounds. I had the privilege to hear her sing also. Even after she retired there was an occasional message on FB. Thank you for the difference you made in so many people’s lives. Truly a treasure. 💔



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